"Hey, Dix, I just had a strange thing happen on the system. I'm being asked a question that I have never seen before."
"OK. what did you try?"
"Well, A, B, C, and **"
"Still nothing?"
"Still nothing, my man."
"I have to see it. We'll run it when you come by and see what we can do."
"You got it. In the meantime, I'm moving on."
So, I moved on. I did my work. All the time I kept my fingers crossed. Everything went well and I had a record billing session. I was happy and didn't uncross my fingers because I was hoping that I could replicate the problem in front of the right person. The guy who said, "I gotta see it." Now that has to be weird. Imagine wanting to be able to replicate a problem. Actually, it's not really that strange. Any time we have a mechanical piece of equipment that develops a "strange noise", we show it to an expert, and when we do, the noise isn't there. Come on,admit it, you've had this experience before in your life. So, I was actually hoping that this particular situation would repeat itself at the crucial time so that I would not be embarrassed.
Then, the second thing I wanted was that the problem could not be traced back to me, you know, me. So, I wanted it to be wrong (remember a couple days ago?) but I did not want to be wrong. Of course! Did you ever feel that way? You sure did, and you know it.
"Hi. You want to show me your problem?"
"Yeah."
"Fire up your computer, get back to where you were and show me." (Lord, mind your own business. I need this thing to go wrong.)
"OK"
So I plug the machine in. Press "start", let it boot up. I direct it to the Internet location that I need. I line everything up the way I had it. You know the drill...click, click. I.D., Password, Enter, Page up, highlight, right click, copy, paste, etc... All the time I'm glad that the owner is behind his fuzzy wall while I'm doing all this. I am sweating and grim. Finally, just before I get to the last two clicks, he gets up, swings around the wall and ambles up to just behind my chair as I give it the last fatal click... In a nanosecond I went from Limbo to Purgatory. There it was, clear and unblinking. The devastating error message. That was good, but not perfect. Don't forget, before I got to be a billing clerk, I used to be the guy looking over the billing clerk's shoulder trying to solve his/her problem. So I braced myself for the 3rd degree.
"Where'd ya get the numbers?"
"From a previous billing."
"Why not from the data base?"
"It hasn't been updated yet."
"Try going here."
So I go "here."
"Why'd ja take that number?"
"Cuz it's the first one on top."
"'K, lemme check."
He goes over to the main computer that has the data base and other founts of information.
"Hmmm. Wanna tell me the 'T...' number?"
I tell him.
"Hmmm. Did you check the file?"
"I did."
"Hmmm."
[Stop it, will ya!]
"OK, I got it. We'll have to update the data base and get the right number in front of you."
I can start to see the shine on my "get out of jail" key, so I suck it in and ask, "Can we check the detail of this other information before doing anything else?"
"Why?"
"I suspect a serious discrepancy there and it could be inconvenient in the future."
"OK."
"Hmmm."
[Not again.]
"You're right. I got it. "A..." has data-entry habits that make things different. We'll fix it and we'll be free and clear."
BOOOOOOMMM!!! I break through the sound barrier and go zipping by St. Peter straight to 7th heaven.
What a gift! There were no leprechauns involved and everything went the way it should when something is wrong. I have to say that I am sure that there will be other times when the other scenario will develop, but for this time, all went well. I am now happy, at least for a little while. Ya know why? It's cuz it was the boss's glitch, not mine. Schadenfreude!
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