BONJOUR, MONSIEUR -- UH, UHM, BONJour!

I have been having fun with cultural things ever since I got to France.  I have always prided myself as being comfortable in France and Italy because I speak the language.  So this is France.  Am I comfortable?  Oh, yes.  Also making a lot of funny observations, no, I take that back, they aren't funny observations.  They are factual observations of perfectly correct behavior that triggers a reflex in my funny bone.  The hands-down winner in the category is the little guy who is in the urinal stall next to the one that I chose.  I pull up, get in position, unzip,and before I get 1/8 of an inch down on the zipper, the little guy looks over the partition and says, "Bonjour, Monsieur."  [Hello,Sir.]  So I respond to his smiling face with a chirpy "Bonjour."  Then I turn to business and file it away as being caused by an excess in politeness and respect.  As I stood there I remembered the fact that when we were traveling from Corps to La Salette, everyone who boarded the bus greeted the driver and the driver dutifully greeted them back.  Come on, passengers and bus drivers exchanging greetings?
Then there was the couple of times that I had to stand in line for bus tickets.  I had forgotten how adept the french are in insinuating themselves between you and the shared target destination.  It's really quite humorous.  They know that is is considered rude to cut a line.  They also know that if they do that they will be called out by the person who was cut and be publicly humiliated.  So they slip and slide and every so gently carve out their space right before your unsuspecting eyes.  But not your body.  Your body can feel every single move.  Slightly daring sometimes, smooth and comforting at all times.  They are absolutely ingenious at this kind of behavior.  If they don't succeed in outmaneuvering you, [this is, remember, a "contact" sport] they will, from their frustrated three quarters angle shot sweetly look at you and say something really brilliant, like, "Please permit me to ask a question that will require only 5 seconds."  How are you going to say "No?"
Oh, yeah?  I dare you.
So, not you're going to hear the whole 300 word question, including footnotes and watch the ensuing ticket purchase transaction take place right by your side.  You'll be so flim-flam-bamboozled that some one else from the opposite side will have taken advantage of your hapless situation and proceeded to enter into a transaction ahead of you.  I guarantee that you will be so impressed by the whole sensuous tango of the whole thing that you will not even be angry.  You'll buy your ticket and move on, full of wonder at what had just happened to you.
Therefore, beware of strange things that can happen to you if you ever get to France.  I suggest you come.  The people are more fun to watch than the scenery.