JOB SEARCHES -- I'VE HAD A FEW

MINE HAD TWIN HEADLIGHTS, NOT JUST ONE

"What Color Is Your Rainbow?" Remember that book? I do. In fact I saw it on the rack just today. It made me think of the first time I had to look for a job. I didn't have a rainbow. I had a bicycle and a need for money. I was 17 and I had just dropped out of school. I decided that I was going to go to work rather than to follow everyone's advice. Now you have to understand something: I had had jobs before this. I had dug ditches when I was about 12. I had delivered papers a little bit, not too much. I worked on the tobacco farms of New England. I had a summer job working for a construction company. That was the one and only job that I ever got by getting a reference from EFR Dion. He never said anything, but he must have regretted it. He never did it again. So, anyhow I didn't know the color of my parachute. That was nowhere near being a concept in those days to begin with. Parachutes were white silk. Period.   So, I'd go to Mass in the morning, go home, have breakfast, put on some decent clothes, get on my bicycle and go to the city across the river where the jobs were and start knocking on doors.  Despite having had jobs, I had never had to go BEG for one.  You know how hard that is for a 17 year old stud?  I did it.  There were some funny things that happened along the way.  The one that was the least funny [but in many ways the funniest] was when a huge truck ran over my bicycle.  I had placed my trusty steed in a safe place, close to the building.  I went in and talked to the manager of the paper mill.  All he said was, "Can you work nights?"  I said "yes."  He said, "How old are you?" I told the truth, "17."  "Sorry kid," says he, "ya gotta be 18 ta work here."  OK.  I turn around and leave only to come face to face with a burly, but very contrite truck driver.  Not far to his left is a very crumpled up J.C. Higgins, Sears Roebuck brand bike.  Man, what a pretzel job that truck did on my wheels!  The man was rather nice to me though.  He said, "not only ya don't got a job, ya can't get nowhere no more."  So I just kind of smiled and he consoled me by saying that he was sure that the company would replace my bike.  I gave him my name,my address and telephone number and left the remains of my only viable transportation where they lay knowing that someone would throw them away.  I am glad to report that it took only a few days before I received $50.00 in the mail.  I bought a brand new bike and still had some change.  Not bad, eh?
Now it was only about 1:00 PM, and there were a lot more doors to knock over, so because I was now on foot, I started looking for work in the direction of home.  It was a smart move in one way, but it didn't get me any "yer hired" acclaim in the more than one hour that I canvassed the area.  As the days passed, I did get good at introducing myself.  I decided that I would use the good humor approach.  I would size up the first person I saw and try something new on each one.  Stuff like, "Great place you got here!  Ya got a swimming pool?"  That one really bombed, so I scratched it.  The one that really worked was, "I can tell that you are looking for a second baseman."  One guy actually said, "Nice try, but we're looking for a mountainous catcher."  But the one that really worked was, "Good morning.  I'm looking for work.  I know I can help you."   As I said that a good looking secretary came out of the office and she recognized me.  "Oh, hi!" she said.  "I'll bet you're looking for Harry."  Oh heavens!  I've won something big here.  I only know one Harry and he's the manager of our amateur baseball team.  Sure enough, here comes Ol' Harry and in 15 minutes I got a job.  I'm gonna be rich. Harry looks at me all serious and demands, "When kin ya start?"  Now I've learned not to tell the truth all the time.  Like that one time before, remember?  So I chirp, "Now."  Harry says, "Nice try.  I put ya ta work in dem duds an' yer father will have my neck.  Go home 'n be here at 6:45 tomorra mornin'."  

Here it has been two weeks of constant rejection and in 15 minutes my life got  turned around.  All the way home [about 2 miles] I kept thinking, I'm so glad it's not a paper mill or a weaving mill.  It was a printing shop, a fairly big one, a division of the Springfield Republican newspaper.  Holyoke Magazine Press it was called.  I got a ton of stories about that part of my life.  All of them "G" rated too.  
Fast forward more than 50 years.  I can still find a job when I need one.  I walk into any place and if I like what I see I say, "Hey, you look like you could use my help."  Most of the time the answer is, "No kidding, but I can't afford it for now."  I have some tricks that work and I have some that don't work.  Lately, I've been offered jobs without having to ask.  That's nice.  Of course, lately I've also been told to get lost without having to ask.  But that, too, is a story for another time.