Friday, February 17, 2012

DEFINING MOMENT -- WHAT? WHEN?

This now the 17th of February,2012.  It will be so for about another one hour and forty-five minutes.  This not really very significant except that I got a brainstorm today that fits in with which I have been planning now for about 6 or more months. It is one of those moments that defies description.  It moved me to take notes while I was waiting for Belle to come out to the car from a small errand that she was completing.  That doesn't happen very often.  Even though I do a lot of writing, I rarely get moved to take notes so as to not forget something.  I think of something and swear to myself that it is great grist for my blog mill.  So I open up my mental Bible and put my right hand on the page and swear that I will make that the topic of "365 Thoughts..."  Dare I tell you you how many broken vows I have racked up?  Nope.  But this is different.  It is so different because it defies the plan that I already have for this project.  The Plan, as I know it in my heart is at least 10 years old.  It might even reach back to 15.  Let me check.  I have it right here.  Just a sec, OK?  I found some good stuff, but no dates.  I do know that it has to be between ten to 15 years ago.
So, anyway, today I finally came to the realization that there is one moment in my life that says who I am.  I am willing to say that everything that I have ever done or failed to do revolves around that moment.  I would never have given a thought to the possibility of that happening to me.  I was just quoting a famous French philosopher last week.  I was saying to a friend that this philosopher, Jean-Paul Sartre said that that the way a person dies defines who that person was.  Hey, wait just one little minute here, I am not yet dead.  Yet, I am not afraid to say that I have discovered that important moment in my life that is irretrievably "THE MOMENT."  
It is interesting that I find myself writing about it on this blog, because I had plans to make another blog the home of my deep philosophical, psychological,  theological musings.  I even had the title defined when I first made the notes I have mentioned above. So, I have a decision to make.  I'll let you all know what it is when it is cast in stone.  Don't think for a minute that I am going away.  Ha!  Nice try.  
I wonder how many of you have had that experience of being overtaken with such a profound awakening.  This is the third time that I have had one, but none this powerful, not one with such a sudden eruption.  This was perhaps only about five or six months in gestation. So now I have it.  You are all with me in this.  The moment is not ripe for divulging it.  My plan since the outset has a deadline a short time in the future.  It is longer than you can hold your breath, but it is not very long.  I promise that I will tell you.  Imagine, a coming of age saga of an old man.  
I was also pushed to run to one of my favorite psalms after "the event:"  [Psalm 86]

9All nations whom thou hast made shall come and worship before thee, O Lord; and shall glorify thy name.
 10For thou art great, and doest wondrous things: thou art God alone.
 11Teach me thy way, O LORD; I will walk in thy truth: unite my heart to fear thy name.
 12I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart: and I will glorify thy name for evermore.
 13For great is thy mercy toward me: and thou hast delivered my soul from the lowest hell.

Verse 13 is the one I flashed on.  I sure pray that I can live up to that grace.


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