Sunday, June 16, 2013

'SNOT FATHER'S DAY WITHOUT THESE > SEE BELOW


You know what?  I gotta tell you that it has been at least 40 years since I have been blessed with white handkerchiefs on Fathers day or on any other day, for that matter.  Let me tell you, not a single day too soon.  I was down to my last three.  I was really worried because I did not even think that it was possible to buy them any more.  That's why I scanned one of the packages so that you can all see that it is indeed possible to buy handkerchiefs.  White handkerchiefs anyway.
Since I was not the one who went out on safari for these things, I still do not know if there are some like used to exist with the light blue trim in the corners and around the edges.  I do know that there was another outlet than the one featured in this photo.  So there are at least two retail outlets who have them.
There is one thing that has struck me in all of this.  My elder son could not stop recounting the bewilderment of his friends when he told them that he was buying me a dozen handerkerchiefs.  His friends did not know why he would do that.  One of them actually asked, "What are they for?"  When he answered the question, the roar that went up was heard in every corner of the planet.  All he said that he was left with was the lame remark, "Yeah, my father is really old school."
Old school is right, but new school too.  after all, handkerchiefs are not just for snots, you know.  They clean eye glasses [see, I didn't say "spectacles!"], they wipe windshields and GPS screens.  Now see, I'm new school too.  I know how to use a GPS, even without the nasty British lady telling me where to go.  
The exclamation point on the experience is this.  The Voice from the Kitchen did not think that #1 Son would think that a dozen handkerchiefs for his old man was a worthy Fathers Day present, so she, while waltzing around JC Penney's inquired about the availability of such an item.  It was almost as bad as a guy asking for ... hummm, never mind.  But anyway, after the person finished choking from hold back laughter, Belle was directed to the location of the handkerchiefs.  The store employee wasn't going to be caught dead near those things.  So, long story short, I went from having three hankies to having two dozen.  I suppose that that is nearly enough to line the pine box that I have waiting for me.
Now, before you get too excited, I have to tell you that these are not linen handerchiefs like used to exist.  They are cotton, plain, thin cotton and they come with specific directions about how to clean them.  No strong soap; no chlorine bleach; gentle dryer heat; low, very low steam iron setting and of course, gentle, very gentle nose blowing, if any.  This activity is to be avoided as much as possible.  I know all this because the direction sheet was signed,


1 comment:

  1. OMG Paul now I know of someone else beside me who uses a hankerchief to blow my nose. What in hell do those dumb folks do to blow their nose if not this useful tool. Do they carry tissue with them or do they know how to blow the nose without any such device. My dad showed me the trick to blow my nose with a hearty blow. Of course you must keep the other nostril closed while using the thumb. And I must say that I too am down to 3 such items but now I know to go to JC Penney to replenish my supply. I thought I might have to go to a "specialty" store but thanks to you my search is over.
    Patrick

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