I WANNA LEARN MORE -- REALLY? -- WHAT? -- HMMM, LEMME SEE...

Of course you do.  So don't we all. But you know what?  I hear this a lot.  I hear it practically every day.  Every day! Now look, it's been a long time since I came to the conclusion that the world is full of people who never threw the pointy hat away when they were let out of the classroom corner.  But I didn't ever think that there would be so many asking me to teach them something that they could learn simply by looking out the kitchen window.
That's only one of the foibles.  What about when someone buys a new gadget and unfolds the little paper that has the directions of how to put the thing to use and still can't get it done?  
"Hey, You, [yes, that's my name] how do I get this thing to work?"
 "Hmmm, lemme see...Oh, right here, slide this little guy over to the right and you're in business."
"Neat-oh! how dz'ya do that?"
"I read the directions."
"I wish I could do that, but I don't understand technical language .  I guess I should learn how to do that."
To which I find myself thinking more than sometimes, 
"Phew, I'm glad I don't have a doctorate!"

Most of the time I hear it from church goers.  "I wanna learn something new."  Oh, that's a good one.  I jump all over this one.  
"Dz'ya go ta church yesterdee?"
"Uh-Huh"
"What did Jesus say to the Pharisees yesterday?"
"Jesus talked to the Pharisees yesterday?"
"Yep, sure did.  You were there right?"
"Yyyeeahhh, I was."
"Looks like you missed an opportunity to learn something new."
End of that conversation.

I don't want to belabor the point too much, but I do have another one that I hear a lot: "I wish I could learn Spanish."
Huh?  Spanish?  Here in Southern California?  Not a chance, not here!  
I hear this so often, that it chokes me every time because I know that the speaker is just making small talk conversation.
People who talk like that don't have a clue of what it takes to learn another language.  Right, Donna?  Right, Kimberly? 

It's an interesting world that we live in.  I won't make it any more interesting for you by telling you that I'd like to learn more math.  Now that, my friends would be pure Stercus Taurorum from the Pisces himself.  Right, Laura?  Laura knows how futile that statement would be since she wasted a ton of time trying to explain "x" to me over her kitchen table some years ago.
So, no, I don't ever say "I want to learn something new."
I just look out the kitchen window and it works all the time. I can prove it...just ask me about the sex lives of hummingbirds.