Sunday, May 13, 2012

FIRST THING[S] I LEARNED -- REALLY

The earliest things I learned, on my own, I think. 
1. Don't load your new gun in the house while your bragging about it to your brothers.  [Before age 5]
2. Don't get into an argument with the 12 year old guy who lives on the third floor and you are in the back yard looking up.  [Before age 5]
3. Don't get so angry that you can't (or won't) dodge a flying tin can.  
[See #2]
4. Don't fall in love with the girl next door until you really get to know her. [Before age 6]
5. Don't mess with your uncles when they are baby-sitting you. 
[Before age 7]
6. Your mother really gets some things right, some times.  [Before age 7]
7. Rhubarb sure is SOUR. [Before age 7]
8. Tomatoes are fruit. [Before age 7]
9. People you like die. [Before age 7]
10. There is no Santa Claus [Before age 8]
11. Diapers are easy to change, even if you have to learn how to use safety pins first.  Which I did.   [Before age 8]
12. Don't eat a banana for breakfast and then go directly to the community swimming pool.  [Before age 8]  I should have listened to Mom
13. Swallowing your bus fare can almost kill you. [A month or so before age 9]
14. If you're going to kill the "Cock of the Roost" out of frustration, resist that temptation.  Talk it over with your father first. [Before age 12, I think]


I don't think I missed any.  I learned a lot of things, but here I tried to remember the things that "came to me" either by introspection or spontaneous experience.  Of course, some of them are humorous... but then that is life, now, isn't it?

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