OLD AGE, A GIFT? HHmmm

I had this thought.  I looked for a picture.  I found this one.  I'm using it because it fits.  I found it linked here: http://blackberrycreek.typepad.com/blackberry_creek/2008/05/the-gift-of-age.html
I started with a different take on the thought than what appears in the blog stated above.  I am therefore going to proceed, now that I have been fair to the blogger who created the thought[s] contained in the above.  My driving force is the death of Steve Jobs, the co-founder of Apple Computer. He was 56.  I come from a family in which the majority of its members died before 50.  They all died quickly, except for one or two.  Now, a whole generation of this family has disappeared and I am the eldest surviving member of the generation below the one that has disappeared.  I am somewhat older than 50.  Old age is a gift.  It is a gift of time.  Old age is certainly a challenge.  It is not easy for a person to accept the general weaknesses that come with the accumulation of the years.  To those who conquer the temptation to feel bad for themselves because they aren't 35 any more, old age is certainly a gift.  I have not been quick to come to this mind set.  All my adult life I have been fervently praying for a quick, heart attack death.  Just get me out of here.  Lately, and particularly these days when I get the chance, like everyone else, to reflect on the death of one of the richest people on earth, I am happy to still be here.  Steve Jobs knew that he was dying for some time now. That too was a gift.  Not that illness is that great a gift, but in many cases, it is.  There are so many of us who don't get the chance to participate in the immediate planning for the inevitable.  We all know that we are going to die.  We all know that we have to stay ready.  We all know that our entire life should be planned with the inevitable in mind.  We all, and I mean all, spend a lot more time planning what we're going to do next month, next year, etc. more than we spend on preparing for the Great Inevitable.
So, what are you doing to prepare for it?  Are you preparing by creating something that will live beyond you and force people to remember you because of it?  Are you preparing by taking the advice of the Great Teacher who counseled us to care for the widows,the orphans, the hungry, the naked, the imprisoned, the lame and the sick?  The good part about the second option is that this is a preparation that can be done during an entire life time,no matter how long.  Yes, even in old age.  My maternal grandmother used to go out in the cold, icy weather to visit the old people who could not go out.  I used to laugh to hear her say, "I'm going to visit the "Old Lady Robitaille this afternoon"  My grandmother was 85 and the "Old Lady" was 72.  To my grandmother, her old age was a gift.  She was sharing it with the "Old Lady."  It is not humble to use yourself as an example, but hey, I'm humble and I'm proud of it.  Therefore, as an example of gifted old age, I have found a way to share what I have.  I would prefer to have gainful employment (you know $$$) but I find myself contenting myself trying to make you all happy electronically.  I am thankful for every hour of every day that I have.  I laugh every time I think that my doctor told me that no one is old before 80.  So, OK, I'm not old yet, but I allow myself to accept my "advanced age" as a gift.  A gift that allows me to share what I am and what I have with the world.  I am thankful that I have had the inspiration to accept this stage of my life as the active collaboration for the planning of the Great Inevitable.  It might be tomorrow or it might be in 2020.  Whenever it happens, know that I was ready and thankful that I had the time to design the exit.  If you are around at that time, keep this in mind and you will not be the least tempted to cry at my funeral.

WE THREE KINGS OF ORIENT ARE,

The other day I got an idea that struck me as something that is totally new to me and had never entered into my life before.  I have been rolling it around in my gourd since then and I have finally decided to try to put it down in concrete terms.  I have to tell you that it is once again another religious thought, or at least one that takes its meaning from my interpretation and understanding of a religious event..
I happened to be thinking of the Magi, the "Three Kings" who came to visit the Baby Jesus, per the Bible story with which we are all familiar.  This event is traditionally interpreted by professional Bible scholars as the moment when God enlightened the rest of the world, outside of Palestine, concerning the universal presence of His Son in the world.  This is the New Testament announcement of the presence of God to all humankind.  God had actually taken steps to make His Chosen People realize that they had a mission to others, but they never quite caught on.  Even in politics, none of the alliances that the Israelite kings tried worked out very well.  Now, in the Gospel stories we have "kings" coming to Jesus and bringing valuable gifts.  They recognize Him as a king also and they are warned to protect Him in a spiritual way.  The same way that Joseph had received his message from God.  Love those dreams!
The thought that has been rattling around in my cage is this:  by giving gifts, they came to know Him better.  By giving gifts, they came to know His reason for being better.  I get the intuition that this is a way that God has of revealing Himself to us.  I think of the Old Testament sacrifices and the expectations of God regarding them.  The demands he puts on His Chosen People (us, really) are very strict and very bold.  Offerings must be offered to Him and to Him alone.  They must be the first born, unblemished male of the flock, not the runt.  By giving the least, we show that we love ourselves more than we love the one to whom we are giving the item.  Think of Cain.  When we think of giving a gift to someone, we look into ourselves and try our very best to understand what would make the greatest impact on the recipient.  This forces us to enlighten ourselves about the person.  Even if it is our spouse; our child; our parent.  When it comes time to give a gift, we realize just how little we know of the person to whom we want to offer it.  It is in preparing for the act of giving that we delve into ourselves to try to uncover some more of the mystery of the beloved who is destined to receive a part of us.  This preparatory period even creates a change in us.  We many times feel apprehensive about how the gift will be received.  We ask ourselves if it is proper, or if it is good enough, or if it "fits".   I wonder if the Gospel writer thought of all these things before putting his story down on paper.  I bet that God was thinking of it and saw to it that we too would come to understand it at some time in our lives.
Thanks for letting me share this experience of mine with you.  Let it be one more reason why you should not offer me tears at my funeral.  By reading this, you know that it is one gift that doesn't "fit."

GIFTING PHILOSOPHY

Shake it, shake it, shake it!

I have decided to give you my life long thought on gift giving.  Question to be resolved:  Is it a gift or a donation?
HHmmm...Interesting query, my dear Watson.
I actually think of this a lot.  I also have to admit that I am conflicted by the question. I am caught in the middle of the struggle.  When I give someone a gift, I strive for something that is really not a true need in the life of the intended receiver.  I don't normally want to make a donation.  I want to offer something that the receiver would not acquire other wise.  Sometimes I get downright silly and I hope that the receiver will enjoy both the gift and the humor in the gift.  I know that there are some times in my life that my attitude backfired on me.  But hey, ya gotta have something to weave memories out of, right?
The conflict comes when I know that it is not a time in this person's life to be "gifting" because it is a "donating under the pretense of gifting" moment.  So, to quote a famous man whom most of us know, "To live with people, you got to be people."  So I control myself, sometimes.
The other moment of conflict comes when I know that I NEED something, but I don't want to ask for it because it is not culturally acceptable to ask for THAT.  That's when it really hurts, but then again, that's when you learn about life.  Another famous man (This one was infamous, actually) told me once, "It is more meritorious to be gracious under difficult circumstances that you do not choose, than to sacrifice in a way that you choose."  Now, you'll all agree that there is a lot of truth there.  
Then there is the gift that you get that you know is really a donation because the giver has pegged your situation right on the nose.  That's a tough one.  If you're like I am you wiggle and squirm and make all kinds of "humble" remarks like, "You shouldn't have,"  "This is really too much", and all the rest that you know as well as I do.  Many years ago I was working as the typist/secretary to the Director of the Community.  I was working in a large "house", an orphanage managed by nuns, on the second floor over-looking the gorgeous Mediterranean Sea.  Every now and then the very pretty sister superior would come and give me a glass of cool water, a bunch of grapes or some such small thing to make my life more pleasant.  I thought it was embarrassing to be treated so nicely by the superior, so I did a lot of protesting, rather than just being nice and receptive.  One day she simply said, "Fratello (brother), you must try to make yourself comfortable enough in life to just smile and say thank you."  Now that, I number among the best gifts that I have ever received, even though it was, at the time, more pain than gain.
It is said that the Buddhists have the attitude that it is good for them to beg at the Temple because it gives the donors the opportunity to do something good that makes both sides happy.  They (the Buddhists) consider taking donations graciously as giving a gift back to the donor, the gift of the happiness that comes from helping someone else.
Bottom line, I am just like everyone else.  Sometimes I do what I want, and sometimes I do what I know the receiver needs.  Hey, maybe I should listen to Buddha, "Take the opportunity to make yourself feel good, no matter what."   I suppose that with an attitude like that, everyone around me will come to feel good too.