a. Stop trying to find the source of the reason. Like, trying to make it a kind of punishment. Get off the guilt thingy. OR, make it an injustice because there might be someone out there in the universe better qualified than you. OR, anything else that might tend to make you feel uncomfortable.
b. Stop trying to prove yourself incapable of fulfilling the demands of the situation. Like having to settle the estate of your deceased parent who died intestate.
c. Stop worrying about what others will think or will judge about your performance.
d. Stop locking yourself into a sound-proof box about the position in which you find yourself. You'd be surprised what you can learn from echos.
E! Finally, stop asking yourself that silly question.
I personally learned early on that the answer to that question is nowhere to be found other than within myself. Like, "Why me?" Let me show you. Yeah, even You, God. When I find myself in a "Why me" situation, I get to work so that in as short a time as possible I start to feel comfortable with the path to take. Once I have decided that I'm going that way, unless you have a bodaciously powerful reason, not an argument, a reason, to dissuade me, then just stand back, because this is now my gig. Once I have made that step I am sure of at least two things:
1. 50% of those around me will think that I am OK. The other 50% will think that I am the biggest, invincibly ignorant, incompetent dunce who could have ever been put in the given situation. Once I have identified those in said camps, I help myself to the assistance of the positives and lift the middle digit to the negatives.
2. Once the situation has been resolved [This too will end. Right?] I will have the answer to the question that has only been asked by me once, at the beginning. Now that it is the end, I know the answer.
In my life about 85% 0f the time the answer is "I did all right. There are others who could have done better. There are others who could have done as well. There are still others who could have done slightly less well. There are others who could have failed." So the reality of the outcome is that I now know a truth about myself that I did not know before I started. Among those who thought that I would fail there will be some who will have to admit that I did OK. Among those who stood behind me at the beginning there will be those who will think that they got snookered. So, what else is new? The split will still be about 50 / 50, because some will have changed places. And me? I'll be happy that I got through it alive.
This, my friends is truly my rule of life. Now, I ask you, why would anyone cry at my funeral?
